Tuesday, June 10, 2014

When They Are Ready

If you are looking for expert advise, STOP reading now. As I have repeatedly informed everyone I am not a supermomma, backed up with all researched facts in child rearing and psychology. What you will see here is how I stumble day in and day out of momma life and somehow yield OK results. I have been going at it blindly. I am not OC, never have been in any aspect of my life. I have tried of course to do what is best, based on my capabilities. On the other hand, I do acknowledge my short comings and  safe to say, better them. What I can offer maybe, is the bits of observation about the things that worked out for me. 

I have this theory that I have been nursing in my head for quite awhile. I have seen it work with my eldest and waiting if it will hold true for my girls as well. I am glad to say this theory has been re-affirmed by all my 3 kids yesterday! Yes! In one day! So anyway, let me just come out and say what it is. So you know how when you read articles about milestones and when your baby should be reaching them? And then at the end they will say every baby is different blah blah blah and assures you that it is ok if your baby hasn't done this or that yet.  Well I have taken that part to heart. HAHA I do not believe in putting pressures on my children. That every milestone should be on the dot as to what the books say. Sometimes they are advance and sometimes behind. BUT THAT IS REALLY OK. More so now that Sandra and Lila are not hitting the same milestones at the same time. It can be a cause of worry. But what good will it do if I push the other just because I compared her with her sister? Right? 

So anyway I am going a bit off track. What I really want to share is how kids are so brilliant that they will let us know when they are ready! So here comes my concrete example from yesterday. 

I haven't been rigidly teaching my girls their alphabet and numbers yet. Although I must admit I second guessed my belief on that one for awhile. Anyway last night the two were not cooperating with me at all! I usually do a countdown which works with my eldest all the time. I just tried, maybe, they would get it too. BUT to my surprise - when I said 1 they answered in chorus 2! Then alternating with me! What the?! I forgot that I was seriously mad already. It was so funny! What a great surprise! So really they absorb these things without us having to drill it in them. They are too young to understand these concepts anyway.  However they will show you that they are ready to LEARN so take their cue and fill their brains up! 

Another incident happened with my eldest earlier that day. We went ice skating for the 2nd time and he learned to skate on his own! He is 7, so that might not be such an impressive feat if you do not personally know my son. This little guy, for some weird reason has turned out to be an overly cautious one. He is not up to taking risks if he knows there is a possibility getting hurt. He always holds my hand when we walk around the mall especially on escalators, he does not run in the parking lot more so in the street. He sticks close by when we are out. He does not like roller coasters. When he was younger he cries when we swim, he does not go on slides or jumps off things. And the list goes on... So when yesterday he let go of my hand and skated on his own I was jumping for joy. He also recently just learned to swim by himself floating and dog paddle-ing.  This boy who clutches on my hand for support all the time - let go. I was so proud of him and I think I heard his message loud and clear! He is letting me know he is ready to take on things and be more adventurous. I cannot be any happier!!! 

To give another example, I also applied this to potty training my eldest. Now my twins are the same. They are the ones who started removing their diapers on their own and saying pupu when they needed to go. Same goes for a lot of things, like having them eat on their own, playing a certain toy you are excited for them to try or that game you want them to learn. Wait it out so at least you skip the frustrating part and deal with it when they are READY. No need to rush really. They will get there before we know it.


Do not try this when you are training them to stay put in their cribs, car seats, high chairs and strollers. There is no waiting that out. Best to start right away and get them used to it. There is no way you can force them into that once they are older. I have learned the hard way times 3. 

much love

Monday, June 2, 2014

To My Daughters

My darlings, 

Oh how time flies... and I am scared to forget how you both are right now as you turn 2. 
You girls are so beautiful inside and out and I take much pride and joy watching you grow into great individuals.

Dear Sandra,

You are warm and friendly, have an easy smile that you give to us all and a strong low laugh that surprises me every time I hear it. You have taken into your role as an Ate to Lila so seriously, so early, without us imposing that role upon you. It is so endearing watching you pacify her, give in to her wants as soon as she cries and let go of whatever it is you are holding that she is grabbing from you. Thank you for being so easy to handle, sleeping through the night and just being chill as you are. It is amazing how your mind works too. You have now come to name animals, lion being among the first ones. I once found you on your own with an animal book pointing at each and naming them. You enjoy building using legos and blocks and solving the wooden puzzles. You have started I find it so cute how you crinkle your nose and show all your teeth forming that wide grin you give with matching head tilt. The way you purse your lips when you kiss is forever in my mind. 

Dear Lila, 

You are my feisty little one. Your smile dazzles me and everyone else you decide to reward with it. You have such an adventurous spirit, finding ways to climb up chairs and everywhere else then jumping off them. You are obsessed with baby wipes and wiping your face clean then every surface you can get to. You are always up to something and we run trying to catch up to you. You love to dance and sing its beautiful how you entertain us all. I find you loving books now too and asking me to read them over and over. I love how you grab my face refusing to let me leave your side and kiss me hard, the way you keep shoving your face in my tummy or sometimes even on my leg is pretty amusing. 

My girls, 

I also want to tell you how you both are so responsible at this age. I am watching you now trying to fix your own bed, placing the pillows, laying down the covers. I am thankful too with how early you both started following long instructions and commands. Truly a big help to momma. I am so grateful of the times when you show your love for your Kuya and for one another. When you hug him when he cries or each other. I love watching you in each other's presence, content with the company and at ease. Sometimes even quiet. This balances how you both are most often super kulit and magulo! How you have this endless fascination with pouring alcohol, wrapping chargers around your necks and playing with sockets. How you both love to keep washing your hands and splashing water all over. How you -Lila, loves playing with powder, putting it all over yourself and then dumping it on the floor. Same goes for Sandra but her product of choice is lotion instead. How you find it funny when someone goes ow, ouch or aray, when someone hits something or falls over. A real head scratcher that one. How you both are just simply a lot to handle since there are two of you. It is extremely overwhelming but amusing to say the least.

You have now started taking much interest with mom's make-up and my shoes. Very sad for my broken compact and smushed lipsticks but nonetheless am happy. You both get overly excited at the thought of dressing up also. Too excited actually that sometimes you tend to remove your clothes at the wrong time? Although this happened once followed by you Sandra saying pupu and when I brought you to the toilet you did do it there! YAY for letting me know you are ready for potty training. You are both getting your key words in too, Sandra more than you Lila. I think you are holding out on us Lils and I cannot wait for you to surprise us! Like that day when you held up a Boggle letter and screamed "A" and you were right! I will forever be happy to hear you express your "thank you's", "good night's", "borrow's", "fix's" and even when you scream "MINE". You have gotten that practice of repeating everything you hear so we better watch out. Since now you Sandra have gotten my expression "Oh crap". You say it every time you get your hand stuck and can't put it through the arm hole properly. And you Lila have said "Oh My God" around twice already!

I will forever remember playing "ring around the rosy" with the both of you and with Kuya. Laughing when we get to the part where we all fall down. It will never stop to be amusing whenever you hum the theme song of Universal Studios before a movie starts. Or when Sandra attempts to copy Lila and try to cross her arms over her chest and fails. I will not get over how when Daddy and I hug you both squish yourself in between.  You are our princesses. We love you both so much!

I am so happy you are in our lives. I sometimes watch you still in disbelief you came from me! For this year I promise to have more adventures with you guys that will give you a chance to explore our world. Again I love you both. Happy 2nd Birthday!!!

much love